You laugh too loud. You smile too much. You need to wear makeup.
This is real feedback I received at different times in my career. Each was genuine, framed in behavioural change, and carried business rationale. As a career oriented young adult, I adapted.
You laugh too loud – it was “startling” and impacted customers. I was offered professional help. I conceded that now being aware, I would keep it in check – thank you for telling me.
You smile too much – apparently my smile made me appear flighty and insincere. This woman-to-woman feedback was offered …anonymously… via 360 feedback exercise. As I debriefed the feedback I learned the source and thus how I knew it was another woman – thank you for telling me.
You need to wear makeup. This led to a corporate paid professional coach who also guided me to “act like a woman, think like a man, work like a dog”. I was truly appreciative of the investment and feedback especially if this was going to hold me back from a corporate career – thank you for telling me.
Maybe, the world is starting to change? For reflection: leaders – feedback might last a lifetime; young people – feedback, regardless how hurtful and inappropriate it might be, can still have grains of value.
Change Management | Mentoring | Strategy Development & Implementation
#saturdaymorningmusings #feedback #leadershiplesson
Yvonne Thevenot says
Thank you for sharing Rebecca! I have had some wonderful follow-up discussions, in particular with young women I mentor, as a result of this post. I am always happy to further the discussion if anyone wants to reach out directly!
Thank you for sharing your insight, Yvonne! You continue to inspire me with your enthusiasm for living boldly and with courage.